THE
UNIVERSE
ACCORDING TO BILLY
BUBBLEGUM
Billy Bubblegum's Parole Hearing
Welcome to the parole hearing
What we'd like to know
Is why you should be released,
Now on with the show.I did everything you asked me
I worked hard everyday
There's a job out there for me
And I have a place to stay.I'm sorry for the crime I did
I think I've paid the price
I'll report in as required
This prison ain't too nice.I'll pay all the monthly fees
And make full restitution
I'll do anything you want me to
So I can leave this institution.The Board has reached a decision
I'm sorry to say Mr. Bubblegum
Your parole is hereby denied
Because the prison still has room.
POLITICIAN'S SAY... WHICH MEANS...
| I'm not opposed to welfare for those who honestly need it. | No one honestly needs welfare. |
| I will not be swayed by partisan politics. | I want them to do it my way. |
| We need to let free market forces determine prices. | Prices are going up. |
| I try to be available to my constituents. | Call me when I get back from Tahiti. |
| We've struck an agreement that allows private use of public lands while setting aside areas for wildlife. | We just sold half of the National Parks. |
| I promise | I may or may not |
| I favor term limits. | I retire next year. |
3/16/00
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