By wrapping up a 5-15 year sentence on a
"max out" in my state, I found myself getting called up to bring my
mattress and "state clothes" to the administrative part of the
prison on the morning of November 3rd, 2007. I was told to put on a
pair of jeans, sweatshirt, and sneakers with a light jacket, and was ushered
to the front lobby of the facility. As I sat in 
a plush chair, ten feet away
from the pair of glass front doors, I felt like Alice in Wonderland about to
venture through the looking glass. I collected my release pay or "gate
money" as it is called, plus a few hundred dollars I had saved by selling
cartoons over the years. I was issued a temporary I.D. card, and told I was
free to walk out through that pair of glass doors! My girlfriend Barb and our
friend Cheryl were in the parking lot to meet me. It was a joyous and
emotional occasion.
Walking as a free man those first few hours after being locked up for 15 years felt both strange and familiar at the same time. I hit a few fast food joints and shopped in stores and it felt good to interact with people as just a regular guy. Folks smiled at me, something I was not used to. Usually a convict got looks of indifference or disdain from the staff at the prison. Now a teenager with purple-streaked hair was smiling and thanking me as she rang up my purchase! That never happened at commissary.
I had to learn how to pump gas again (as the pumps now take credit cards directly), and I got to finally use a cell phone. I commandeered Barb’s cell phone, bought a Velcro-flapped pouch to wear on my belt, and have been wearing Barb’s cell phone ever since. It’s my new Toy. I bought some new clothes and some basic stuff I needed. It felt good to shop and hold and spend money I had earned over the years. I called family and friends, and we talked and verbally celebrated my release.
My new home is surrounded by fields and
woods in a nice rural community, and the small town mentality prevails amongst
the fo
lks here; they are friendly to me, and my past doesn’t seem to be an
issue, at least among Barb’s friends and our church. On walks in the woods
to a river behind our property I have so far seen a turkey and some muskrats.
I feel alive again like an animal feels after leaving his cage, senses on high
alert and totally aware.
Tasting good home cooking again is a most heavenly experience. I was so sick of prison food toward the end of my bid, most of it I didn’t eat. Of course fast food at McDonalds and Burger King tasted great too.
My girlfriend Barb is amazed at how I perceive things. She says she is seeing the world through my eyes right now, and enjoying the wonderment of the new experiences I take in each day. Soon I will have to get a job to bring in money, but I will never take a single day of freedom for granted again. I will never take life for granted again.
I want to thank all the family and friends who continued to love me all of the years I was locked up, you know who you are, and I love you all. I still have some good friends serving time. I want you all to hang in there until your day comes, until you walk through the looking glass.
