ROAD TO TOMORROW
By Anonymous
What does it take for people to aspire to become greater human beings? Does it take disasters in life to open our eyes to sincere change? These questions affect not only men inside prison, but women and juveniles as well. They not only affect prisoners, but the entire human race.
I look around and see people smiling, people consumed in madness, people crying over everything they have lost, and deep down, I know everybody’s miserable, including me. Well, we all have moments of peace in our lives, even true joy at others, but beneath the surface we are all people who miss our families, our friends and ultimately, our freedom. We have a good reason for being low sometimes.
I feel the pain and the darkness. I feel it washing over me from everyone around me. For nine years I have struggled through growing up in an unnatural environment, one never meant for a person, trying to fight the influences of racism, peer-pressure, and hatred. I reflect back to all of the independent battles I have fought, all the victories and all the failures. It happens to everyone. Obstacles arise inside us and around us. We are faced with options and choices. We make our own decisions for better or for worse. Regardless of how pretty or ugly the bed is made, we will lay in it.
It’s frustrating to know that programs and education are offered, and live the reality that a lot of people don’t qualify due to crimes, sentences, and long waiting lists. I understand this because I am living here inside it all. When the breaking point comes, it’s hard to hold on to reality.
I won’t give up. I fight all the hatred to remain strong, to remain positive, to smile everyday and to be the greater person that I’m capable of becoming.
I hear people talk about parole and release, and I encourage them to do everything they need to do to reach that point. I offer my opinions to go to school instead of watching ‘General Hospital’ and all the fantasies they see on TV. We have a lot of time to take advantage of every possible positive opportunity put before us.
I encourage guys around me to accept cruel and vindictive behaviors because it’s a part of life here. If we want to live as comfortable as possible, we have to ignore the abusive insults
- the sometimes harassing moments - and be strong not only for ourselves, but for everyone who loves us on the other side of those fences. Everyone has their opinions, and I say it’s worth accepting to get home.Maybe my feelings are biased, but I feel the justice system isn’t fair, and I try to address that in a positive way. Every ounce of me wants to be free, to have intimacy with someone who truly loves me, free to have the career I choose, free to build a family and have little ones running around me that I can see myself in, laugh with and raise with greater understanding than I had growing up. Everyone wants this, especially me!
At times, the only thing that keeps me going here are the guys that I know have love for me, people who I relate to and share a bond with. Even though people say "you can’t have friends in prison", I have many. Guys from all walks of life: black, brown, red and white. Guys who worship Jesus, Buddha or nothing at all. Guys whose blood is no lighter or darker than my own
- guys I count on.I have family and friends outside who, although they cannot understand this world, try to understand me and support me, cry for me and want me home. To the men and women who say, "I don’t have anyone," I say you have yourself. We all woke up this morning, and if that’s all we have today, then that’s a start.
Throughout all the drama and craziness we suffer here, I still believe in hope. Our hope for a greater tomorrow
- I know it is possible - something we have to actually work for. Will it be easy? Never! Will we sacrifice? Always! I’m the type of guy who always tries to understand everyone around me, and wish them the best of everything, regardless of our situations or the circumstances. Prison isn’t only hard on men; it’s hard on women too. I really feel bad for the kids society thought couldn’t be reached without locking them away. Some say "Life is a fishbowl – I cannot see it inside the cage."I was passionate about prison reform, justice reform and parole reform. I couldn’t see any way for me to change things for the better and then my eyes opened. I can encourage everyone around me to push for positive changes with everything around us that we feel is wrong--not pushing in any negative ways
- constructively for the changes we feel are right. It’s a tough concept to grasp, but it’s far better than sitting around thinking of ways to be destructive.It starts inside of us
- who we are and everything we know we can be. We can be greater than what we are. Rehabilitation can be offered by the state, but it can only be achieved by you and only you if you want it. Push to be great against the darkness, pain and confusion in your life. The most important tools are inside you. Your dreams and aspirations! We all aspire to be something in life. Let it be something great!A band called Shinedown made a song called "Burning Bright" that best describes how I try to see things.
The lyrics say:
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The more the light shines through me I pretend to close my eyes The more the dark consumes me I pretend I’m burning, burning bright |
I may never get out of here alive, but I’ve accepted that a long time ago. It makes no difference where we are today. Tomorrow is where we should focus. Despite the obstacles we face in life, I believe that something better waits for us there, if only we make it. When you can’t have faith anywhere else in life, have it in yourself, and invest the effort and time into making you a great individual, one worthy of respect, honor, love and freedom.
